nasal spray.

I am SO happy and I feel SO SO proud of myself today!!!.. The reason for that, is that I haven’t used my nasal spray for 3 days now! 3 fucking whole days! I am one little proud girl! :D Wauw, I really sound like an addict right now haha – but really I actually am…..

I’ve been addicted to nasal spray on/ off since I was like 4 years old, so this is like a really big deal for me! ..This last period, I was addicted to it for 18 weeks, and it says on the label on the nasal sprays that you shouldn’t use them for more than max. 10 days in a row, 3 times a day… I used it 6 times a day for 18 weeks… wauw it’s so dumb.. At least, in the end I only used it 2-4 times a day – combined with this saltwater nasal spray I’ve also got.. But 3 days ago, I decided to just stop even though my nose was all clogged up – so I did :) :)

I’ve stopped using nasal spray soooo many times before, and then short after, I was addicted again… I always felt the same way when I stopped, but this time I felt different from any of the other times that I had stopped – And I realized something….. the sadest part is that, I actually found out that it had all been mental.. It was all just up in my head… I thought I was just addicted in the sense of the nasal spray working the opposite way because I had used it too much and that was why I got clogged up the whole time… But it wasn’t like that….. I had actually been addicted to it for real… Everytime my nose was clogged up, it was myself who had created it in my head… Like, you could tell it was that way, because everytime I’ve felt clogged up these past days.. I just had to relax and wait for maybe 30 minutes and then I just wasn’t clogged up anymore… then it happened again, and I did the same thing.. and then it just disappeared?.. This happened over and over again… but today I kinda had it all under control, so I haven’t been clogged up at all today actually! YAY!! I feel good :D I also realized that I’ve really got a problem, ’cause even though I’ve been able to breathe perfectly fine through my nose today, I have been SO close to using my nasal spray! The entire day I’ve had to tell myself “no!” – I really feel like I just need it!!… I think it has had a calming affect on me, and maybe that’s why?.. But it’s kinda sick to think about, that I got to be so addicted……

Well, now I’m just looking forward to hopefully a lot more days without that stupid nasal spray and I will let you guys know how I’m doing, staying away from it in the future – I need to… ’cause what’s really sad is that I know I can’t use nasal spray anymore for the rest of my life, because I can feel that, if I just use it ONCE again in maybe 5 years – BAHM! then I’m right back and addicted again…….. and I don’t want to be, even though I already miss it..

GUYS! Promise me something; DO NOT GET ADDICTED TO NASAL SPRAY….. EVER!!!.. and if you already are… then STOP!.. I’m telling you to stay away from that shit! It can ruin your taste buds and olfaction… just saying – And you don’t want that.. Trust me!

Waaaaauuuww!.. I just did 590 words on nasal spray! haha :D

Goodnight people <3